Tuesday, September 22, 2009

Best Court Ever

The Court: Next witness.

Ms. Olschner: Your Honor, at this time, I would like to swat Mr. Buck in the head with his client's deposition.

The Court: You mean read it?

Ms. Olschner: No sir, I mean swat him in the head with it. Pursuant to Rule 32, I may use this deposition for any purpose, and that is the purpose for which I want to use it.

The Court: Well, it does say that. (pause) There being no objection, you may proceed.

Ms. Olschner: Thank you, Judge Hanes. (whereupon, Ms. Olschner swatted Mr. Buck in the head with the deposition.)

Mr. Buck: But, Judge.

The Court: Next witness.

Mr. Buck: We object.

The Court: Sustained. Next witness.

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